One of the current favorite talking points of Third Wave Feminism is to lecture everyone on the dangers of ‘toxic masculinity’. A Google search on the topic will return 100’s of pages from the Salons, HuffPos and Voxs of the world on how ‘toxic masculinity’ is ruining society; the theory being that many traits shared by the male half of the species are not only undesirable, but dangerous to the survival of the human race. While I have no doubt that this argument began as a way to temper the baser instincts of us Y chromosome carriers, the hyperbolic nature of the feminist rhetoric has fanned the flames of this debate into a raging war against masculinity and ensures that anyplace where the concept of ‘toxic masculinity’ is taken seriously is simply an environment that is toxic to masculinity.
On any given day males are browbeat with a constant barrage of articles, courses and TV shows where they are cast as villains simply because they are male. Males are not born with the original sin of sexism, but attempting to strip them of their masculinity as the solution will only make the problem worse, not better. When you combine high amounts of testosterone, emotional immaturity, poor impulse control and then strip from it the guidance that can teach young males to not only control that volatile combination, but channel it into positive results you instead create a generation that is not only confused about their role in society, but ill equipped to become a productive member. There is still a role and a need in our society for men to teach boys how to become men.
Take this recent example where a 16 year old boy thought it was a good idea to toss an elderly woman in the pool simply because she was requesting that they turn down the music. Ordinarily I would not waste my time pontificating about this incident, but in a Gateway Pundit article on the incident a very odd tweet about the assault caught my eye. In this tweet it laments that they are sorry how the BlockBoyz pool party ended and then goes on to make the ridiculous claim that #BlockBoyzAreGoodMen2K17. Now watching this video a couple of times I have to say that I think we have very different definitions of what constitutes what a good man. There were several places where I think a good man would have interjected himself into the situation to deescalate or assist the elderly lady. A good man would have simply respected her request that they turn down the music in a community area. A good man would not have cheered when people started calling for her to be tossed into the pool. When the youngster dropped the elderly lady a good man would have rushed to assist her. When the youngster picked her up and began moving towards the pool again a good man would have attempted to stop it. When the youngster tossed her in the pool a good man would have jumped in to assist her or at the very least not run like a coward. Yes we have very different ideas of what makes a good man.
— GR8NESS••|| (@Mighty_1ne) May 7, 2017
Real men are respectful. Real men are honest, but not cruel. Real men are honorable and lose gracefully. Real men keep promises, even those with which they disagree. Real men protect. Real men provide for their families. (Unbunch your undergarments feminists I am not talking about providing in the strictly financial sense, but in the sense you provide to the best of your abilities those things that support your family.) Real men are humble, but not afraid to excel. Real men take responsibility for their actions. These are the lessons that every father should pass to their son, but every day it seems we strip young males of positive role models who have successfully made this transition. We have made ‘men’ a dirty word to which boys should never aspire to become and removed the single best tool at our disposal to convert boys into men who make their mother’s proud.
Feminists lecturing males on how to be men is like elephants teaching fish to swim. They might have a general concept, but the details and mechanics are all wrong. Instead of feminists pushing the agenda that all forms of masculinity are inherently misogynistic and evil they should instead allow those males who are getting it right to train the next generation. You cannot strip away millions of years of evolution where the traditional traits like aggression were instrumental to the survival of our species and expect overnight that things will change because you teach a ‘smash the patriarchy’ class to some second graders. We can have all the lectures in the world, but as long as we are teaching boys that an indivisible portion of themselves is toxic we will never create good men.